


I'm Broken

by ijustwantahugfromleetaeyong



Series: I'm Broken (Lemme Fix You) [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Dark Past, Developing Friendships, Don't Examine This Too Closely, First Meetings, Fluff, Friendship, I Tried, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Insecure Lee Taeyong, Jaehyun Just Wants to See His Face, Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun is Whipped, Lee Taeyong-centric, M/M, Past Lives, Secrets, Shy Lee Taeyong, Soft Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun, Soft Lee Taeyong, Taeyong Hides From The World, Taeyong Loves Christmas, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Winter Wonderland, festive, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-29
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:15:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27766609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ijustwantahugfromleetaeyong/pseuds/ijustwantahugfromleetaeyong
Summary: Taeyong's facial deformity means he wears a mask wherever he goes, and he has learnt to slip in and out of life untouched; unnoticed. Until one fateful Christmas, he meets Jung Jaehyun, but when his safety net is nearly pulled away, Taeyong does what he always has and runs away.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Lee Taeyong
Series: I'm Broken (Lemme Fix You) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2031232
Comments: 13
Kudos: 78





	I'm Broken

The perk of being a freak is that your nose doesn’t get cold in the winter.

Taeyong can’t think of many benefits to his fucked up life, but that’s definitely one of them. As he mills through the Christmas shopper crowds, he’s not the one cupping his hands and breathing deeply to summon some warmth into his frozen face.

Of course, then again, there are downsides. Like how it was impossible for him to enjoy the festive coffees in his favourite cafe, or how most people could never fathom a word he said and just nod dumbly. Ever since the car accident had left him with such a demoralizing, dehumanising scar - at least, that's how he's always seen it, no matter what his mother said - his life had never been the same.

His life was… odd. Quiet. _Lonely_.

Having squeezed through yet another crowd of kids enjoying the street decorations, Taeyong finds himself underneath a blue and white arch, decorated with snow flake carvings and endless tinsel. At the top, on a slab of oak, read the words _“Winter Wonderland.”_ He smiles to himself as he tentatively steps through the archway into a literal Heaven.

Surrounding him are a thousand trees, all intricately decorated with matching stars and twinkling lights, as well as several dozen stalls selling everything from candles to gingerbread, and mulled wine to cards. There are a selection of rides tucked away at the back of the park, each glowing a different shade of neon. There are pinks, blues and greens as far as the eye can see. He lets his eyes take in the scene before him, boots crunching over perished autumn leaves and a thin blanket of cheap, fake snow.

Christmas was Taeyong’s favourite time of year.

He loved the magic that surrounded it, and the way everyone was suddenly so in love with life. Taeyong always made the effort to attend the Christmas Eve Winter Wonderland every year, despite the fact he lived alone in this sprawling, strange city.

The wonder of this season for him was so much more than the warm faces and bright colours… the wonder was in the fact that no one looked at him twice. It was the only time of year that he drew no extra attention, because everyone else was wrapped up in their own hectic Decembers. He passed through, leaving no trace, and Christmas was Taeyong’s favourite time of year.

He busied himself wandering around, snapping pictures, buying trinkets here and there. He even treated himself to a selection of iced ginger animals tied beautifully with a silver ribbon. Taeyong was grinning, unknown to the rest of the world. Something about this place just brightened him right up.

He was preoccupied for a brief moment, gazing up at a selection of rubber ducks wearing Christmas hats, when he felt a touch on his shoulder. Instinctively, Taeyong tenses up, but turns out of curiosity.

“Hey, uh… Sorry. This is probably very weird, um…”

In front of him was a boy, probably in his late teens or early twenties, sheepishly rubbing at the back of his neck with pink cheeks. He was either cold or embarrassed, and Taeyong found either option to be quite endearing. The boy was a stranger to him, but he had a very adorable dimpled smile and he kept shaking his brown bangs out of his puppy dog eyes.

“So, what do you say?”

Taeyong realises then that he had zoned out completely, “Oh, goodness, I’m so sorry. I- Could you- What did you say?”

“I said, it’s probably quite weird, just approaching you out of nowhere, but… well, I noticed you’d been standing here a while and you kept looking at the duckies so I- Well, I wanted to win you one? If you want? If not I can go… Yeah, actually, maybe I’ll just go…”

“Wait.” Taeyong grabs the stranger’s hand as he turns to walk away, waiting for their eyes to meet again, “Sure. Why not?”

They share a smile, but Taeyong’s is invisible.

-

An hour later, Taeyong was strolling around the park with three small ducks tucked safely away in his bag. Beside him was the same boy, who’s name he’d learnt was Jaehyun.

They’d spent a good while at the stall, with Jaehyung pouting - rather adorably in Taeyong's opinion - and refusing to give up until he knocked a duck off the stand for Taeyong. In his determination, he’d knocked three off at the same time and although it was probably (definitely) against the rules, the vendor handed them all over. It was probably just to get rid of them both.

In the short while they’d been talking, Taeyong had learnt three things about Jung Jaehyun.

First, he was from Chicago, which prompted the question “So, what are you doing in London at Christmas?”

“Holiday with friends, decided we’d visit while we had the time off for Christmas.”

Secondly, Jaehyun was in his second year studying art at University.

“It’s just so… free. So much of school for me was restrictive, but art just flows. I can do my own thing, leave my own mark.”

Thirdly, he was intrigued by the one thing Taeyong hoped he wouldn’t be.

“Your mask.”

Taeyong glances around himself nervously, “Yeah, what about it?”

“It’s pretty. I mean, so many people wear them at this time of year, but yours is the brightest and cutest I’ve ever seen.”

Taeyong tentatively raises a hand to touch it, “I- I suppose it is.”

It was true. Taeyong was sporting a mint green mask with embroidered ribbons and teddies, one of his favourites. It was necessary for him to have favourites, seeing as he owned so many. They were… a necessity.

Nobody could see the hideous scars underneath the colourful, embroidered lie.

“I just wish I could see your face.” Jaehyun is looking at Taeyong, like really looking at him, as if trying to sketch in his mind what he thought his lower face looked like. At some point they’d stopped walking, and Taeyong shoves his clammy hands in his pockets, staring back.

He really hoped that Jaehyun would change the subject. They could talk about anything, literally anything else.

_But not what was under the mask._

“Can I see?” Taeyong was panicking. This has never happened before.

“See… what?”

“You.”

_“Me.”_

Jaehyun chuckled, seemingly finding this all very amusing and not sensing Taeyong’s panic in the slightest, “Yes, silly, who else? I want to see what you look like.”

Taeyong was frozen, his eyes wide and staring at Jaehyun, who’s gaze was so lovely it could even make him cave. But he wouldn’t. Taeyong had made a vow long ago that he would never give in and show the mark of his past to anyone, and that included Jaehyun.

“N-no.”

Jaehyun reached for Taeyong’s gloved hand, and Taeyong drew away reflexively, hissing under his breath as though he’d been burnt. He started to well up.

“I- I’m sorry, Jaehyun.” And without hesitating, Taeyong turned his back and ran in the opposite direction, whisking himself away until he was caught up in a whirlwind of people and drifting snow, leaving Jaehyun further and further behind him until he was out of sight.

Taeyong never stopped crying the whole way home.

**Author's Note:**

> Guess who is publishing a oneshot to ignore the fact they haven't updated their ongoing fic!!
> 
> Haha it me!!
> 
> about : We'll Take The Highway to Heaven  
> The chapter is in the works, and should be published soon, but I had this sat in my drafts and as Christmas is drawing near I though I should feed any of you who are awaiting updates! This one is quite ambiguous and abstract, and a little out of my comfort zone, but I hope you like it! It's also the first time I'm attempting a series hehe!!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading!
> 
> Thank you for comments, kudos, subs and even just hits!
> 
> Twitter : @rosietyongf


End file.
